chenanceou: (Default)
[personal profile] chenanceou
I haven't been around forever and after getting an e-mail from an online friend basically asking if I was still alive I thought it was time. I do think about posting, but all I have to say is such a downer and, frankly, I'm not in the spirit of schizo posting (feeling one way, posting another). I do know there are people here who do care about me and who do worry. Even when I have been MIA for so long.

All I can say is that it has sucked. Wrong diagnosis, wrong meds, really bad reaction to treatment and all the joy that goes with all of that have made me go see a shrink just to manage the situation. It turns out I'm not one of those strong, stoic types. More like angry and seriously pissed off. And talking about it does not make me feel better. Just makes me feel more of a wuss for not being stiff upper lip-y about the whole thing.

The procedure went well, btw. I was just lucky enough to get an infection that resisted the first antibios they gave me. I have learnt not to trust doctors and I have also learnt that picturing myself as a v. hungry vampire eating up the doctor who is ticking me off is oh, so very therapeutic.


In case something more permanent happens I have this:
How to let your online friends know you are not coming back.

Date: 2009-03-14 07:32 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] cindergal.livejournal.com
I'm so sorry you haven't been feeling well, Chen, but I'm glad you checked in. I've been thinking about you. ::hugs::

Date: 2009-03-14 07:45 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] rockgoddes.livejournal.com
I'm really sorry things haven't been going well, sweetie, but I hope you're on the mend.

Thanks for checking in and I'm continuing to send positive and healing energies to you.

And lots of love and *HUGS*.

Date: 2009-03-14 07:57 pm (UTC)
usedtobeljs: (Juliet Stevenson as Madame Arkadina)
From: [personal profile] usedtobeljs
Oh, Chen. [hugs and more hugs]

I've been thinking and worrying about you -- and I'm so sorry the worry has been justified. Please let me know if I can do anything to cheer you...

[hugs thrice]

Date: 2009-03-14 08:55 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] txvoodoo.livejournal.com
BIG BIG HUGS, darling.

I never mind if my friends whine a bit online, but I don't demand that they do, either. Sometimes it feels good to do it, but sometimes I feel like it just feeds that emotion in me, and I don't want to feed the bad.

MORE HUGS.

Date: 2009-03-14 09:11 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] redeem147.livejournal.com
No matter how things are, email me. I want to know, good or bad.

It's better than worrying, and you can yell at me if you need to yell at someone.

Love you. Miss you. Hope I never get an automatic email.

I told Lianna just to post on LJ if something happens to me. Word will get out.

Did I mention I love you?

Date: 2009-03-14 09:11 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hesadevil.livejournal.com
It's good to see you posting, I've missed you, Chen.

Oh and I aten't dead (yet) either.

Date: 2009-03-14 09:57 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] wisemack.livejournal.com
(((((CHENNIE)))))!!!

Is that exclamatory enough, do ya think? ;)

Love you to pieces. Think of you often. Miss you all the time.

Have been AWOL myself for a while, but not for any calamitous reason, thank goodness. Just a bit of weirdness combined with sheer laziness on my part.

And dammit, I especially thought of you a few months back. Remember my sad tale of the hateful substitute teacher and the book report? The b*tch who killed my urge to write? Well, I wanted to tell you that she recently croaked! And I never got a chance to tell her what a blight she'd caused, which is just so not fair. *sigh*

So okay, I'm on Yahoo a lot and always up for a chat. BING ME sometime, 'k? We need to catch up!

Date: 2009-03-15 12:21 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] paratti.livejournal.com
I'm really sorry you're going through all of this.

(((Hugs)))

{hugs}

Date: 2009-03-15 01:45 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hico.livejournal.com
sorry about all you're going through.. but glad that you decided to post anyway :)

{hugs}

Date: 2009-03-16 07:38 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] rusty_halo.livejournal.com
I miss you. I wish you weren't so far away. :(

Please don't feel like a wuss for not being stuff upper lip-y. Being sick is bad enough without you punishing yourself for your reaction to it. You have every right to be angry and frustrated with the situation you're in.

I have also learnt that picturing myself as a v. hungry vampire eating up the doctor who is ticking me off is oh, so very therapeutic.

*grins* That definitely sounds like you. If it makes you feel better, awesome.

I hope your girls are doing well, and I hope you feel better soon.

Lucifer and Angel say hi. :)

Date: 2009-03-16 10:19 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] bookbabe1999.livejournal.com
*hugs* I am sorry that things are not going well. Medical diagnoses are a bitch when they are accurate, and when they are inaccurate... :P

I hope things get better soon.

Date: 2009-03-23 12:27 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fenchurche.livejournal.com
Chen!!! It's so good to hear from you!! (Even if I'm a bit late in seeing this post.) I've been a bit worried, since it had been so long since we'd last heard from you.

I'm so sorry things haven't been going well, but hopefully it will get better soon. {{{Hugs}}}

Date: 2009-04-22 03:55 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] txvoodoo.livejournal.com
Totally OT, but HAPPY BIRTHDAY.

*smooch*

Date: 2009-04-23 03:36 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] rusty_halo.livejournal.com
Just dropping in to say Happy Birthday!

I hope it's a good one. *misses you*

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